Quite some time has passed since our last blog post, our apologies! If you are on our email list you’ve been receiving store specials and company news – not on the email list? Oh you should be! Just email us at firstname.lastname@example.org and we will have you added in a jiffy.
Today is our 220th day in business, and that is just crazy talk. We have met so many new faces and given so many treasures great new homes. We are forever grateful for the patronage.
Speaking of new faces, that is what this post is about. We had always heard the good, the bad, and the ugly of the retail world. We are still new, so we still have the rose colored glasses on – for the most part our customers are perfect angels. Almost. We can still count on one hand the amount of times we’ve been yelled at or cussed at, so that is a win right? We were asked last night what are the craziest things that have happened in this store so far, and we wanted to share our top 3 wackiest with you now. We sort of made up some nicknames because we aren’t sure what their real names are because we were too baffled and appalled to ask at the time. Are ya ready?!
#3: Tooth Fairy Freddie – We are a family friendly establishment so don’t get that mixed up. Granted, we occasionally prefer people bring their pets in instead of their children. We can be sweet as pie to every child who walks in here, but there is always that one (or two) that see our flashing neons and pretty colorful displays and go all out circus on us. One day that child was “Freddie”. Freddie was at least 10 years old (old enough to know better as granny would say). Touched? Every piece of inventory he could get his hands on… Sat? On every item in our inventory with a “PLEASE DO NOT SIT” sign on it. If he broke something we were too afraid to check. After 15 minutes of “Freddie” wreaking havoc with nary a glance from him mom we gave in and politely asked him to please keep his hands to himself because these things aren’t replaceable. He complied for a good, 60 seconds. We went to plan B – distract him with candy. Hand him the candy dish, and he makes a selection. We watch with hopeful hearts he stays busy with his treat, and what does he immediately do? Chomps down on a hard candy and boom, his tooth falls out…onto our floor… His sister starts screaming (yes, screaming) “HIS TOOTH! HIS TOOTH IS ON THE FLOOR!!!!!”. Finally catching his mother’s attention with the unruly screams they go to our restroom to sort the situation out; leaving soon after. We check out the restroom moments later and it is nothing short of a crime scene. Still can’t figure out how the kid lost that much blood from one tooth. The other people helping out that day still joke that the boy probably thinks I am a witch that handed him magical candy.
#2: Let’s Table That – This is an antique and vintage wares business, so by nature we must buy goods from collectors and specialized shows. Inventory like this does not come from a catalog re-order. Moral of the story: we buy. We don’t necessarily advertise that we buy, and truth be known we have a system for buying – ESPECIALLY IN THIS STORE FRONT. We can’t count on our hands and toes, or your hands and toes; the amount of times people we have never spoken to will literally drag their “junk” in the front door expecting a big ol payout. We require appointments, heads up calls, anything but popping in surprisingly. There are certain seasons we buy certain products and we aren’t always in the need for new inventory (trust me, we could fill 5 more stores with the stuff we already have). One beautiful afternoon a woman walks in and she is interested in selling her dining room table that seats 12 people to us. Our building is 19 feet wide. Nineteen feet. If you aren’t good at crunching numbers that is a skinny building. Our square footage for extremely large furniture is non existent so we simply cannot fit it in. We ever so politely explain this to her and thank her profusely for thinking of us. Her reply? Yelling. Lots of yelling. If memory serves us correctly something along the lines of “I ALREADY HAVE IT HERE! YOU DIDN’T EVEN SEE IT! HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU DON’T LIKE MY TABLE?!?!?” And to think, it all could have been solved with a simple phone call ahead of time.
#1: 5 ‘O Clock Somewhere – One quiet afternoon we had a visitor, and we do the usual welcome greeting for him. This customer has a cloth shopping tote bag with him, but nothing out of the ordinary. He looks at the man cave items, compliments our selection. He inquires as to where our bottle openers are located so he can look at that selection as well. We point him in the right direction and go back to our business behind the checkout counter. Moments later a muffled popping sound comes from his general direction, and another, and another. We quickly learn that his tote bag is full of…wait for it… WINE BOTTLES. He has successfully opened an entire bag of wine with our opener and he quickly jets out the front door, but not before pausing long enough to say “Really like what you’ve done with the place!”. The optimist in us is just glad he didn’t steal the opener.
We wish we were making this stuff up, but we couldn’t if we tried! Don’t worry, there’s more where this came from – this is just a top three! Let’s not forget that the good far outweighs the bad around here. Just thought we could share some of our more laughable moments as we work our way through the busiest retail season of the year. We want our customers to be happy, but don’t forget we all have a family and holidays to enjoy as well at this time of year.
We hope to see you soon!
p.s. – the corresponding image is just a silly meme, contrary to our company name we don’t have any problems with drinking. We rather enjoy it sometimes!